Each year at VBS we teach the children to watch for God. We give them bracelets to wear that say just that. We ask them everyday what their God sighting was and we get some generic answers sometimes but sometimes we get real ones also!
This Thanksgiving holiday found our household in our usual condition of illness - Coach Burns, while still recovering from knee replacement in early September, somehow contacted the flu virus. Even though he had a flu shot, this nasty little bug did quite a number on his well being. By Tuesday of Thanksgiving week it was decided that we would be spending Thanksgiving Day home alone....Now that may not seem like a big deal to you but truly it was to me. You see I stay so busy working to supplement the loss of income from Coach Burns that I dont have a whole lot of time to visit with family and friends. Thanksgiving, however, has always been a day of just good food, good fun, visiting and catching up...... except this year homebound with my partner who did not even feel like talking much less celebrating...
Let the pity party begin....so not like me but somethimes you just cant help it! Sometimes you just cant get past the what if or how come or if only... Thankful - yeah right?? Sure I am thankful for all that the Lord has blessed me with BUT a little part of me was resentful and angry and sad and lonely.....Satan was in my head and look out - Laurel Burns was weak and tired and tired and weak...to get thru this four day holiday help would have to come.
So I started to watch for God.....please God show yourself to me somehow...reassure me that you love me and that this is temporary....
The first God sighting came on Tuesday night when a sweet sweet lady friend of mine who offered me an entire crockpot full of soup that she had made. My friend is a wonderful cook, a blessing to all who know her and the Lord uses her daily to show his love. I admire her so much that I overflow with emotion to think that she thinks of Coach Burns and I as much as she does! The crockpot full of chesseburger soup was enough for my office at work on Wednesday and we enjoyed a fellowship dinner together - something that does not happen much in our office. Thank you God for showing yourself to me through Ms. Myra Stewart!
The second God sighting came on Thanksgiving Day when our pastor and his wife prepared and brought us Thanksgiving Dinner complete with cranberry sauce and all the trimmings! I had planned on getting take out from Cracker Barrel for Thanksgiving dinner but once again God showed his love for us through this family that has blessed us for three years now with their friendship, their love and their prayers! They go through so much pastoring a church and their compassion and love never ceases to amaze me. I thank God for them and I am blessed to have them in my life! I believe I saw a Coach Burns smile when he ate his dinner - first one I have seen in a LONG time! Thank you God for Brother Greg and Amory and for showing me that even on holidays sometimes non blood family is truly family!
The next sightings were brought to me through my longtime friends who there simply are not enough words to describe. On Black Friday, I normally shop with daughter but she was out of town (getting engaged - imagine that -Wahooooooo!!!) so my dear sweet friend Sheila and I went treasure hunting - we spent the morning together and it made my soul dance! She is without a doubt an angel - we had an great time treasure hunting and the treasure we found was priceless - time spent with friends cant be bought! Thank you Lord for sending Ms Sheila Hogge to lift my spirits and enjoy the day - I know that the Lord has used her time and time again to help me - she is a treasure!
And finally, leaf blowing....anyone who know where I live understands that we have more pinestraw and leaves than we have dirt and grass....always! Coach Burns has not been able to keep up with the yard work for a couple of years now - we have done just enough to get by. Sometimes me, sometimes Lex, but mostly it just gets neglected. Yesterday after church, I made the comment at lunch that I was going home to blow leaves because the driveway was deep deep deep and it was dangerous to anyone who walked out there - not to mention the cars were skidding as you went in and out of the drive. God sent his faithful servant Chuck Hogge to blow the leaves with a kind heart and a caring spirit and friendly love that was none other than that of Jesus....He quickly volunteered with a smile and an attitude that was contagious! Instead of napping between services, he and his lovely wife spent the afternoon with me! While he worked, we chatted and what a beautiful job he did! No words can describe the friendship - tears of appreciation for all that the Hogge's have helped me through - they are pure angels sent to help me on this path that has been placed before me....Thank You Lord for blessing me with them!!!
Jesus said “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-35
I believe that Jesus knows that Myra Stewart, Greg & Amory Sellers, and Chuck & Sheila Hogge are his disciples! Thank You Lord for letting me see the love!
Monday, November 26, 2012
Friday, October 19, 2012
A new chapter....
Today we start a new chapter in our lives and I am excited. Weeks ago, I never thought I would say those words again unless perhaps it was my time to leave this earth and meet my savior. But that is another story for another day!
What a year 2012 has been for our household - loss of our two precious babies (Levi aka Lil Ball Boy and Annabelle) within 4 months of each other; Coach Burns job loss and disability at such a young age; total knee replacement just 4 weeks ago for him and the pre-cancerous cells for me only serve as a reminder that not all days are going to be good ones.
Throughout all of our earthly circumstances - the Lord has comforted us with His undying love and His ability to send friends and loved ones to walk with us through the dark times. We are forever thankful for the love that He has given us and for the folks that He has used to help us along. We would be so lost with Him and His people!
But today is a GOOD day! Today we embark on a new adventure with a special "unconditional love bug"- A seven week old brownish red English bulldog that will bring new exciting life back into our household.
As I get ready to leave to make the trip to pick her up - a few tears for those we are missing cant help but flow. Oh the memories are so precious! Life down here will be exciting again and perhaps a little easier because of a new little angel to love!
Here are a few photos that the breeder has sent us!
What a year 2012 has been for our household - loss of our two precious babies (Levi aka Lil Ball Boy and Annabelle) within 4 months of each other; Coach Burns job loss and disability at such a young age; total knee replacement just 4 weeks ago for him and the pre-cancerous cells for me only serve as a reminder that not all days are going to be good ones.
Throughout all of our earthly circumstances - the Lord has comforted us with His undying love and His ability to send friends and loved ones to walk with us through the dark times. We are forever thankful for the love that He has given us and for the folks that He has used to help us along. We would be so lost with Him and His people!
But today is a GOOD day! Today we embark on a new adventure with a special "unconditional love bug"- A seven week old brownish red English bulldog that will bring new exciting life back into our household.
As I get ready to leave to make the trip to pick her up - a few tears for those we are missing cant help but flow. Oh the memories are so precious! Life down here will be exciting again and perhaps a little easier because of a new little angel to love!
Here are a few photos that the breeder has sent us!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
My heart just hurts....
I really cant find any words to express what I am feeling other than I hurt. Plain and simple - I hurt - my hearts hurts for some many reasons right now. Perhaps writing it down will help.
My hearts hurts:
Psalm 121
A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
3 He will not let your foot slip—he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The Lord watches over you—the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
7 The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life;
8 the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore
In all things, in all times, no matter what - I will trust in the Lord. Rest will come if not during my time down here, then in the eternal life with Him. May I keep reminding myself that this is NOT my home....There is coming a day....no tears, no hurts, no pain....Come quickly Jesus!
- My sweet sweet Annabelle is not here physically with us. What a beautiful experience she was and yet I hurt at my selffishness for wanting her here even tough her physical body could not take being here any longer.
- The love of my life is not on the sidelines for the first time in 17 years - that is where he longs to be and my heart hurts for him.
- One knee surgery already and now total knee replacment - my heart hurts for the pain in his body and for his emotion well being during this difficult time.
- Lil Ball Boy was taken from us way too soon and my heart hurts for that.
- Emptynest has a whole new meaning now and my heart hurts.
- Our house is too quiet and my heart hurts.
- My aging body and a routinue procedure reminds me that I am not invicible and my days are numbered and time is precious - my heart hurts.
- Our nation is under attack by its own people and the younger generation no longer center around the Lord and my heart hurts.
- I am tired, so tired, so weary and yet I have to be strong one, the decision maker, the reliable one, the constant and yet my heart HURTS.
Psalm 121
A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
3 He will not let your foot slip—he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The Lord watches over you—the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
7 The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life;
8 the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore
In all things, in all times, no matter what - I will trust in the Lord. Rest will come if not during my time down here, then in the eternal life with Him. May I keep reminding myself that this is NOT my home....There is coming a day....no tears, no hurts, no pain....Come quickly Jesus!
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Phone call to the Bridge...
Hello Arthur and Levi!!
I can only imagine all the fun that the two of you have been up to! By now, you should be adjusting Lil Ball Boy and having the time of your life playing all day with that silly ball!!! I just know that the two of you are the best of friends!!!
Life down here is crazy as always - oh how we miss you guys! Not a day goes by that we don't talk about the fun and the love we shared!!! Life was never dull where you were in our house! I can still see you Arthur turning your head sideways just to make us laugh and you Lil Ball Boy - daring me to chase with that favorite ball of yours!
Well we have a surprise for you - today Annabelle is coming to live with you! Now you know how this little momma is - always the momma and always protecting those she loved! She has stayed down here longer than her diseased body should have but in her stubbornness - she would not leave us! She loved us that much!! Even today - she would still stay despite the pain but that look in her eyes tells us to let her go.
So today we will help her and it will not be easy - just like losing the two of you was not easy and still is not easy - did I tell you how much we miss you?
Please do me a favor - wait for her! Greet her with bulldog kisses and butt wiggles!! She wont know how to act in a new painfree body! Don't forget to dance - remind her to shake it shake it girlfriend!!!!
No tears there!! We will cry the tears here(seems like a flood already) and never forget we love you!
See you soon!!!
Friday, August 24, 2012
Do unto others....
I have always considered myself to be a likeable person. I know for a fact that I am dependable and loyal. I love my Lord, my family, my friends, my church, my dogs, my jobs - ALL of whom I cant thank the Lord enough for.
However, when someone boldly lies to me - it hurts - bottom line. It makes me wonder what I did or why I deserve this? After all does not the Bible say - “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you." Matthew 7:12
As I have pondered this situation the last few days, I have come to the conclusion that there is always going to be folks that dont like me...friends that are not really friends....people that are going to hurt me with their lies and gossip...this is the life that we live down here.
The Bible tells me to turn the other cheek - hard to do but I will try after all I am a Christian who is striving to live the way that Jesus wants me to live. And come to think of it, why would I expect people to treat me fairly when they treated Him so cruely...after all He is the Savior of the world - the KING of eternal life and people lied about Him, lied to Him, and crucifed Him.
But the story did not end there - HE AROSE. HE forgave and continues to do so. In my humbleness, I will do so also. Despite the human side wanting revenge....I vow to pray for the ones that feel the need to lie and spread gossip without knowing the facts. I will pray for a forgiving heart for myself and conviction of heart for those who are with their careless words.
Sign me....FORGIVEN and THANKFUL to know who my TRUE FRIENDS are.
However, when someone boldly lies to me - it hurts - bottom line. It makes me wonder what I did or why I deserve this? After all does not the Bible say - “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you." Matthew 7:12
As I have pondered this situation the last few days, I have come to the conclusion that there is always going to be folks that dont like me...friends that are not really friends....people that are going to hurt me with their lies and gossip...this is the life that we live down here.
The Bible tells me to turn the other cheek - hard to do but I will try after all I am a Christian who is striving to live the way that Jesus wants me to live. And come to think of it, why would I expect people to treat me fairly when they treated Him so cruely...after all He is the Savior of the world - the KING of eternal life and people lied about Him, lied to Him, and crucifed Him.
But the story did not end there - HE AROSE. HE forgave and continues to do so. In my humbleness, I will do so also. Despite the human side wanting revenge....I vow to pray for the ones that feel the need to lie and spread gossip without knowing the facts. I will pray for a forgiving heart for myself and conviction of heart for those who are with their careless words.
Sign me....FORGIVEN and THANKFUL to know who my TRUE FRIENDS are.
Monday, August 6, 2012
Prepare the fields…..broken knee.
Perhaps the best movie of all time – Facing the Giants – uses this scenario to remind Coach Taylor not to give up! - The story is about 2 farmers who needed rain. Both prayed for rain. But only one of them went out to prepare his fields to receive it.
Which one do you think trusted God to send the Rain?
The answer: The one who prepared his fields.
Big Question: Which one are you?
God will send the rain when He is ready. All you do is to prepare your fields to receive it.
We serve a God that opens doors no one can shut. He shuts doors where no one can open. In Revelations 3, God said, "I have placed for you an open door that no one can shut. I know you dont have much strength yet you have kept my word and did not deny My name. Keep a tight grip with what you have so no one can distract you and steal your crown. I will keep you safe in the time of testing."
God is not through with you. Until He is to move you, you are to bloom where He planted you. Prepare for Rain!!!!
So all summer long Coach Burns has been working out and running – determined to be in the best physical shape possible for someone with his conditions. Determined to be ready for the open door for the next chapter. Several times I cautioned him not to overdo or to take it easy and each time I was told – Got to prepare the fields!
On Wednesday a week ago, he felt a pain (different from the normal pain he feels every day in his legs and feet) and knew that something was wrong. Doctors visits, XRays, and MRI later – Coach Burns knee is broken in two places – according to the doctor the kind of break that comes from a major trauma – car accident, fall, etc. None of which happened to Coach Burns. Could this be the results of years of medications to fight the ulcerative colitis and rheumatoid arthritis beginning to take its toll on the bones?
Tomorrow he will have surgery to repair the damage and perhaps we will have some answers as to what is fully going on with it. I wont go into the worst case scenarios that we have fears of but will ask that you pray for us in this new chapter of our lives. We are trusting in the Lord and know that HE alone will provide the peace and understanding and comfort/healing that we so desperately need.
Have mercy on me, LORD, for I am faint;
heal me, LORD, for my bones are in agony. Psalm 6:2
Which one do you think trusted God to send the Rain?
The answer: The one who prepared his fields.
Big Question: Which one are you?
God will send the rain when He is ready. All you do is to prepare your fields to receive it.
We serve a God that opens doors no one can shut. He shuts doors where no one can open. In Revelations 3, God said, "I have placed for you an open door that no one can shut. I know you dont have much strength yet you have kept my word and did not deny My name. Keep a tight grip with what you have so no one can distract you and steal your crown. I will keep you safe in the time of testing."
God is not through with you. Until He is to move you, you are to bloom where He planted you. Prepare for Rain!!!!
So all summer long Coach Burns has been working out and running – determined to be in the best physical shape possible for someone with his conditions. Determined to be ready for the open door for the next chapter. Several times I cautioned him not to overdo or to take it easy and each time I was told – Got to prepare the fields!
On Wednesday a week ago, he felt a pain (different from the normal pain he feels every day in his legs and feet) and knew that something was wrong. Doctors visits, XRays, and MRI later – Coach Burns knee is broken in two places – according to the doctor the kind of break that comes from a major trauma – car accident, fall, etc. None of which happened to Coach Burns. Could this be the results of years of medications to fight the ulcerative colitis and rheumatoid arthritis beginning to take its toll on the bones?
Tomorrow he will have surgery to repair the damage and perhaps we will have some answers as to what is fully going on with it. I wont go into the worst case scenarios that we have fears of but will ask that you pray for us in this new chapter of our lives. We are trusting in the Lord and know that HE alone will provide the peace and understanding and comfort/healing that we so desperately need.
Have mercy on me, LORD, for I am faint;
heal me, LORD, for my bones are in agony. Psalm 6:2
Thursday, August 2, 2012
What do you do with a general when he stops being a general?
What do you do with a general when he stops being a general?
Remember this song in the movie “White Christmas” – I love that movie! However, never before have I sympathized as much with general as I do now. He was good man! He devotedly gave of his time, his talent and his physical being to a cause that he believed in. Then he was released to start a new life – perhaps one that he did not know how to start nor was he sure that he wanted.
Well that really parallels with our real life now. You see as long as I have known Coach Burns – he has been a football coach. He has been a mentor to young men. He has pushed them, loved them, screamed and yelled at them, prayed for them, challenged them, motivated them, pulled them, disciplined them, shared the gospel with them, laughed with them, danced with them, cried with them and gave 100% to them even when his own physical health would suffer for it.
Unless the Lord provides a miracle soon, for the first time in 16 years – Coach Burns will not be on the sidelines or in the locker room or in the classroom doing what he loves to do – coach. Why? What a difficult question to answer and my opinions on that do not matter in the grand scheme of things. Is life down here fair? Absolutely not. Does he deserve this? Absolutely not. Is he used up? Absolutely not.
It is times like these when I cry out to the Lord to help me understand and to give me a peace about it so that I may help him understand and have peace also. When someone you love is hurting – you hurt. When you are up on the mountain – everyone wants to be there with you! When you are down in the valley and you feel worthless and weak – where is everyone- especially those who have been with him throughout the years?
I know that the Lord is not finished with Coach Burns yet – Only HE can see the big picture – I just pray that HE gives us the strength and the courage to wait for it, the peace that surpasses all understanding to deal with the wait, the forgiveness we need for the anger and hurt we feel, the ability to see HIS will in all of this and most of all the LOVE that HE continues to have for us despite our disbelief at times.
Remember this song in the movie “White Christmas” – I love that movie! However, never before have I sympathized as much with general as I do now. He was good man! He devotedly gave of his time, his talent and his physical being to a cause that he believed in. Then he was released to start a new life – perhaps one that he did not know how to start nor was he sure that he wanted.
Well that really parallels with our real life now. You see as long as I have known Coach Burns – he has been a football coach. He has been a mentor to young men. He has pushed them, loved them, screamed and yelled at them, prayed for them, challenged them, motivated them, pulled them, disciplined them, shared the gospel with them, laughed with them, danced with them, cried with them and gave 100% to them even when his own physical health would suffer for it.
Unless the Lord provides a miracle soon, for the first time in 16 years – Coach Burns will not be on the sidelines or in the locker room or in the classroom doing what he loves to do – coach. Why? What a difficult question to answer and my opinions on that do not matter in the grand scheme of things. Is life down here fair? Absolutely not. Does he deserve this? Absolutely not. Is he used up? Absolutely not.
It is times like these when I cry out to the Lord to help me understand and to give me a peace about it so that I may help him understand and have peace also. When someone you love is hurting – you hurt. When you are up on the mountain – everyone wants to be there with you! When you are down in the valley and you feel worthless and weak – where is everyone- especially those who have been with him throughout the years?
I know that the Lord is not finished with Coach Burns yet – Only HE can see the big picture – I just pray that HE gives us the strength and the courage to wait for it, the peace that surpasses all understanding to deal with the wait, the forgiveness we need for the anger and hurt we feel, the ability to see HIS will in all of this and most of all the LOVE that HE continues to have for us despite our disbelief at times.
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