Wednesday, April 18, 2012

The sweetest goodbye ever.....

This is difficult to write and may be difficult to read - not sure but it has to be written down before some of the details begin to fade from my memory. It is important to Levi's legacy that I remember the day of the sweetest goodbye.

On Monday morning, I took Levi to the vet early and I already knew that the end was fastly approaching but I prayed that I was wrong. The vets at Montevallo Animal Clinic are such loving and compassionate people - I praise the Lord for them! It did not take them long to tell me what I already knew - Levi was going to die soon. There was no composure on my part - I cried like a baby as Dr. Wadkins promised to keep him comfortable until later in the day when Coach Burns could be there to say goodbye.

As I left the vets office and went home to get ready for work - I found no relief in the tears - they flowed like a water fountain all day long. I could not talk or work - I just sat at my desk in a daze. I called the clinic to check on him and talked with the vet one more time begging almost for something to bring him back to us. Again, Dr. Wadkins assured me of what I already knew and did so with love and compassion.

Coach Burns and I decided to go and say goodbye to Lil Ball Boy at 3:30 pm that afternoon. Little did I know that both Ashley and Lex would want to be there - As a mom, as a protector, as a shelter from the storms - I was scared to let them feel that kind of pain. But they insisted on coming - how could I not let them say goodbye to something they loved so much?

In the midst of the tears, Dr. Bamburg and Dr. Wadkins and all the staff - showed compassion and love in a professional yet personal way (thank you Lord). We all said our goodbyes as Levi layed on the table - he kept cutting his eyes toward Coach Burns as if to say - Help me to go....Our hearts were shattered and tears continued to flow....but GOD was there in a mighty way - HE gave us the strength to love this little fellow to the end. It was peaceful, it was beautiful and it was the sweetest goodbye ever! A memory that I never want to lose.

Never have I felt the presence of the Lord like I did in that small room #2 at Montevallo Animal Clinic surrounded by my children and my husband - Thank You Lord for holding us up on one of the worst days of our lives. You have given me so much more than I deserve and even on the bad days - you never leave me.

Thank you for the memory of the sweetest passage ever. Levi is free of pain! Coach Burns, Ashley, Lex, Mike and I are better people for having loved him! We give you praise and honor Lord! And we thank you for new mercies every day!

1 comment: